YEAR 12

Sorry guys, I think I cannot continue to run this game. I'm very busy right now, and will remain quite busy for the coming weeks. I hate to disappoint, but other things have higher priority.

I thank you for your participation. It's been a pleasure.

YEAR11

Slevadovia

Junior Advisor Franka: "Sir, the woman alchemist has gone into hiding. I've heard rumours that some Zalfirians are trying to kill her, and apparently she heard the rumours too. Because of this problem, the body-altering work cannot continue. The alchemist is the only one who knows the details of the research. We should station more guards in the capital, and especially the government buildings. And we should also check all of the houses in the capital for anything suspicious. And set up a curfew, to limit activity at night. We must protect our people from those grass eating devils."

Advisor Hussime: "That boy is suffering from paranoia. I'm sure she's just lost her time in one of Huesimakor's fine shops. Even in these times we must uphold the advantage of being Slavadovian: to enjoy great freedom. Do you know how much income will be lost if businesses cannot continue their work at night, and if our capital's logistics is slowed down by extra regulations?"

Advisor Augustus: "That ugly woman is a traitor. She must have returned to Zalfir, spilling all your secrets and plans. Or perhaps she is still here, thwarting your schemes. The witch. Why have you ever trusted her? Perhaps you should put a bounty on her head. Let the street scum take care of her."

Zalfir

Advisor Aleras: "The Cyprium coils in one of my labs have started to behave strangely. Preliminary research shows that the effect is not limited to that lab, but that it's something bigger. I expect that the anomaly is caused by some celestial body. This could be an event that affects the entirety of Jotnjordh. All I ask you is to provide some resources, so that we can research this properly."

Junior Alchemyst Frulir: "You know, the way the coils currently behave make them awfully powerful. And our enemies do not have proper technology to counter raw amber-power. Let's put cyprium coils on the back of the spiders, instead of the prisms. It'll be much more effective. Let's disintegrate those slevvies. Rah! Zap! Zap! BOOM! ..... Haha. Fun stuff."

Advisor Avaron: "I say disassemble those coils. No coils, no anomaly. Let's get back to the real matters at hand. I say put some more pressure on our laborers. We need enough resources if we want to win this war."

Equestria

Advisor Glimnir: "Hail Tobion. Hail Dash. Your Ladyship was informed about some strange tunnels through our Fyridium mines, quite a while ago. We now have good reason to believe that those tunnels were made by worms, who also happened to have become scarce of late. Not that we minded of course. Blast them. Pain in the arse they were. Anyway, we know that those tunnels move from a point in the south, to multiple points in the north. So we presume that either the worms moved from the central point outward, or gathered at the central point. Personally I think this is of interest. If you provide some bags o' gold for the expenses of the herpetologists, we will solve this conundrum for you. And we will also make you some nice gloves."

Advisor Gudrun: "Who cares about the ABSENCE of bloodthirsty reptiles, when our beautiful nation is crumbling? We have lost most of our cities. Lovecrafts are behind bars. Show your people that you haven't surrendered us all to that awful Merisik. Arrest all people talking Slevadovian in the capital, or in Love. Use king Merisik as a bad example in our schools. Build some more statues dedicated to the holy Friendship. Do whatever it takes to make people feel good about being Equestrian."

Advisor Feyte: "Why do people care for a nation so much? Values must be defended, and values transcend nations. One value we treasure is love. Let us show that. Love the Slevadovians like you would the Equestrians."

Khemri

Anonymous advisor 1: "A small band of Khemrians in the south has captured a few of those flying horses. We could use these to supplement our army. Perhaps we can breed them to be more obedient. Just give me some claws and your permission to go ahead with the plan."

Anonymous advisor 2: "Do you know how large the Equestrian Kingdom is? Do you know what problems we will get ourselves into if we treat their citizens in such a way? We should capture that band of fiends and punish them. Show the Equestrians we are OK. Maybe we could even trade with them."

Anonymous advisor 3: "Let those fiends do what they want. But no breeding program. To do so would be unwise in these times. But I would not support the punishment of our fiends because some stupid ponies got hurt."

Kingdom of Rok

Advisor Zirt: "I have just heard this. Two bashers named Kroddy and Nyrk have been assaulting other men for a while. Normally I would not bother you with this, but it is the nature of the assaults that make it truly despicable. They are <ahem> raping <ahem> other men. Blerghh, can someone give me some mead to wash my mouth? Anyway, these abominations must be destroyed. Order the attacks, I beg you. Men rape women, it shouldn't be any different."

Advisor Bork: "Those men are strong. The have proven themselves. I thought that was what Rok is all about?"

Advisor Firenz: "This is only the tip of the iceberg. All kinds of assaults and other crimes happen daily. We must create laws that protect the individual, and strong guards that enforce them."

Lienzo Republic

Minister Cayu: "The festival we had on the first year of the second age really showed how great Lienzo's cuisine truly is. How great the potential is, I should say. Most people do not have much choice in food, it's mostly black pudding and lard-covered bread. Other things are only consumed as exceptional treat. Therefore I propose we pump some money into local restaurants, so that poor people can afford great food too. Everybody should be able to have fine steak, cheese and wine every day."

Minister Hierro: "You realize we have spent a lot on health recently? I suggest we use this ongoing food-craze to fill our coffers a bit. Let's increase the tax on prize-winning food. It's only rich people buying it anyway, they'll still be able to afford it."

Minister Senagh: "I remember how it was before all these foreigners came here. All was better. I know we cannot evict them, that would go against our fundamental principles. But what if we increased the general tax for non-vampires? That way you don't force them to leave, but do give a push in the right direction. And the extra money can be spent on local restaurants, just as minister Cayu explained. So that every vampire can get a proper meal every day."

NOTICE

Next year will commence a bit later than usual.

YEAR 10

Announcement: the Austrian nation has ceased to exist, since Equestria has captured Berlin.

Zalfir

Archaeologist Thalla: "Honorable twins, when constructing one of our many cities, construction workers have discovered artefacts of a lost civilization. The artwork shows that they were elves, but their culture was very different from ours. They were worshipping some kind of giant, and regularly sacrificed people in his name. We have found all kinds of tools and jewellery made of crimson glass, associated with the sacrificial ceremony. And most importantly, we have found hieroglyphic texts, waiting to be translated. We have good evidence that there's a lot more still beneath the ground. I suggest we unearth the rest, clean everything, translate and reconstruct the texts, and display everything in a nice museum. Our people will love the outlandish stories."

Advisor Avaron: "The stories might be interesting, but is it really a good idea to show people this? Before you know people like these stories a bit too much, and associate themselves with these brutes, for that they were. They might have resembled us, but were more like people of the Rok in spirit. At least prevent access to the texts, so that people cannot be inspired by those diabolical picture-words."

Advisor Jawahir: "Great as those things might be, decent archaeology does not come without a price. I suggest we ask the public what they think, and whether they are willing to pay for it."

Slevadovia

Senior Alchemist Thanwe stands before you, showing a very muscular, though irregularly shaped body through her green robes. Ugly tumours cover half of her face, and one growth has developed into a small, third eye. She speaks with a heavy accent: "I have led the science team to 'deal' with the ugly curse. And as you can see, it has been successful. We have started manipulating the curse in such a way that the growths are no longer completely random, but actually directed. I ask you now, invest in me, and you will get back your investments in ways you cannot imagine. I only need some gold and healthy volunteers."

Advisor Augustus: "Who is this hag? She might not look it, but she definitely sounds elvish. I say throw her out of the court for speaking in this court. Who has admitted her in the first place? Anyway, I want to address another severe problem. If the SIRO, disease, and addiction problems weren't enough, we have another plague on our hands. I have done some enquires over the last couple of years, and it seems that more and more men have become mentally disturbed. They admit they prefer other men over women. There are even reports of sexual activities between men. Need I continue? I hope not, because talking about it makes me sick. We are a free nation, but not so free I hope. We should not let our good values erode away. We need something to hold on to. Throw these poofters into a deep dungeon, before this mental illness can spread."

Advisor Hussime: "Illness? Plague? Curse? Why are we always so pessimistic? And who says it's contagious? Yes, I have seen these reports too. But I think people are just becoming more outspoken. Whatever they want in their personal lives, is their personal business. To me, this is not even an issue.

And the alchemist - her medical research looks a bit dangerous. But I agree as long as the volunteers really volunteered for the job. And they are getting paid, right?"

Equestria

Advisor Glimnir: "When will you give the order for the deportation of the Austrians? By law, everyone that is not part of a pegasus - dwarf union is not allowed to be a permanent resident of Equestria. We need to either remove the Austrians, or change the law."

Advisor Feyte: "I think our fine substitute leader is allowed to stretch our laws a bit, like the Dash did. That said, I do think we need to make many changes before Berlin can be a true part of our Kingdom. The Austrians must conform to our ways. They are far to focused on hunting and warfare. And pray to a myth. Those that do not conform can be deported anyway."

Advisor Broogr: "Have sympathy for these people. Their previous ruler was a warmonger who claimed to be divine. The nation was in a state of disorder since Kaiser Alexander took ill five years ago. The Austrians have enough problems as it is. Let them keep their heritage, and let them continue their hunting business. Perhaps we could even build a small monument to Fortuna in our capital, to show them that they are accepted."

Khemri

Anonymous advisor 1: "A small band of Khemrians in the south has captured a few of those flying horses. We could use these to supplement our army. Perhaps we can breed them to be more obedient. Just give me some claws and your permission to go ahead with the plan."

Anonymous advisor 2: "Do you know how large the Equestrian Kingdom is? Do you know what problems we will get ourselves into if we treat their citizens in such a way? We should capture that band of fiends and punish them. Show the Equestrians we are OK. Maybe we could even trade with them."

Anonymous advisor 3: "Let those fiends do what they want. But no breeding program. To do so would be unwise in these times. But I would not support the punishment of our fiends because some stupid ponies got hurt."

Kingdom of Rok

Advisor Zirt: "I have just heard this. Two bashers named Kroddy and Nyrk have been assaulting other men for a while. Normally I would not bother you with this, but it is the nature of the assaults that make it truly despicable. They are <ahem> raping <ahem> other men. Blerghh, can someone give me some mead to wash my mouth? Anyway, these abominations must be destroyed. Order the attacks, I beg you. Men rape women, it shouldn't be any different."

Advisor Bork: "Those men are strong. The have proven themselves. I thought that was what Rok is all about?"

Advisor Firenz: "This is only the tip of the iceberg. All kinds of assaults and other crimes happen daily. We must create laws that protect the individual, and strong guards that enforce them."

Lienzo Republic

Minister Cayu: "The festival we had on the first year of the second age really showed how great Lienzo's cuisine truly is. How great the potential is, I should say. Most people do not have much choice in food, it's mostly black pudding and lard-covered bread. Other things are only consumed as exceptional treat. Therefore I propose we pump some money into local restaurants, so that poor people can afford great food too. Everybody should be able to have fine steak, cheese and wine every day."

Minister Hierro: "You realize we have spent a lot on health recently? I suggest we use this ongoing food-craze to fill our coffers a bit. Let's increase the tax on prize-winning food. It's only rich people buying it anyway, they'll still be able to afford it."

Minister Senagh: "I remember how it was before all these foreigners came here. All was better. I know we cannot evict them, that would go against our fundamental principles. But what if we increased the general tax for non-vampires? That way you don't force them to leave, but do give a push in the right direction. And the extra money can be spent on local restaurants, just as minister Cayu explained. So that every vampire can get a proper meal every day."

YEAR 9

Kingdom of Rok

Advisor Zirt: "I have just heard this. Two bashers named Kroddy and Nyrk have been assaulting other men for a while. Normally I would not bother you with this, but it is the nature of the assaults that make it truly despicable. They are <ahem> raping <ahem> other men. Blerghh, can someone give me some mead to wash my mouth? Anyway, these abominations must be destroyed. Order the attacks, I beg you. Men rape women, it shouldn't be any different."

Advisor Bork: "Those men are strong. They have proven themselves. I thought that was what Rok is all about?"

Advisor Firenz: "This is only the tip of the iceberg. All kinds of assaults and other crimes happen daily. We must create laws that protect the individual, and strong guards that enforce them."

Slevadovia

Advisor Stojan: "The cancer curse from the north has spread to our people. It causes all kinds of ugly deformations, though it isn't lethal. Mainly users of the euphoria inducing mushrooms are affected. We must lock down the capital. Protect the wealthy and influential. You will have to stop with the mushrooms for a while. Why don't you try the Corian Mead?"

Anonymous advisor, entirely wrapped in green cloth, and speaking with a strong accent: "We might harness this gift, after proper research. If we can steer the cancers, we might control the change, and become the designers of our own bodies. You only need to give me the funds, and I will do the magic. Just say the word."

Advisor Julio: "Use this curse as an opportunity to deal with your opponents, those SIRO folks for instance. People will think you removed those people to save others. And in a way, this is true."

Zalfir

Advisor Thepoath: "We have a problem of aesthetic nature. Various industries produce waste that is not taken care of. The workers in those industries have other things to do than dispose of waste, and upper-class citizens are not involved in industries at all. The solution is simple: create a government-funded team of environment cleaners, and we have this done in no time."

Advisor Jawahir: "We could, but I don't think it's fair to let people pay to clear the rubbish other people leave behind. Those workers have to do it themselves. Just station some guards near places that are collecting waste, and give those polluters a fine for their littering."

Advisor Nabendu "Nobody is to blame. And cleaning squads cost resources. We need to teach people that they shouldn't think about themselves all the time. Our nation, and the continent, would be a much better place if we did things for each other now and then, just out of the kindness of our hearts."

Equestria

Advisor Kvikke: "Slackers. Lazy bastards. Hippies. People do not get their food in time, causing malnutrition. Building materials do not arrive in time on their destinations. Payments are delayed. Everything is delayed. We must create overseers that poke the dreamers with a pointed stick every now and then. Or limit mushroom usage. Otherwise we *will* go down."

Advisor Moath: "Who is this thunderbug? You are in the nation of LOVE, don't you know? We only care about LOVE. We don't care about no work. We don't care about no houses. We don't care about no food. LOVE is every thing. Let the people do what they want."

Advisor Fruss: "I don't know who you are, but you are the problem, not the slackers. The slackers are the best people around. They know how to not do things properly. If you ever want something not done, call them. Anyway, I think we need to make funshrooms mandatory. It'll change those thunderbugs into butterflies, and everthing is LOVE again. Hey, I have an idea. Make funshrooms mandatory. That'll be good."

Advisor Moath: "Hey! You already said that before, just now. Again."

Advisor Fruss: "No I didn't say nothing. .... Hey I have an idea, what if everybody had to use funshrooms if they want to stay here... in Equescha I mean. Equesch treea. Equesch. ...  Schlopp. Schlopp. Schloppity Schlopp. Hehe. Where am I? Oh yeah. Hehe."

Khemri

Advisor Marakugh:"Milady, some of our wraiths have gone rogue. We don't know exactly who they are, and they might even be here in the palace. This is a security threat level critical. Any day now you might be the target of an assassination; we must act! I gather that the people are less than impressed by the result of the tournament of the silver sword. People think you are losing your grip. Perhaps you should show them what the true results were of that tournament, I'm sure people will regain your trust. And threaten to send them to Equestria or Zalfir, I'm sure they will back down with their violence against your Ladyship."

Anonymous advisor: "What results are you talking about? I know only of the deaths of a few wraiths, and the humiliation of another. You must show your people your strength. Let the wraiths catch some crooks, and then you can tease those nobodies a bit before you eat their testicles and ovaries, all in public. And provide the audiance with free black pudding and bloodwine while you are performing. Make it a good show, and your people will support you."

Anonymous advisor: "Who says it is your fault? Clearly others are to blame. Clearly the Equestrians had the unfair advantage of flight. And who says the Zalfirians did not poison the wax on Malekith's body to make him weaker? To slow him down? And perhaps Zalfir made a deal with Equestria to let Sunglow win. Clearly the Equestrians were informed beforehand of their staged loss, otherwise they would have brought proper weapons. And that a small group of wraiths died in Zalfir is just Elvish propaganda. They are on a very secret mission somewhere."

Lienzo Republic

Minister Cayu: "The festival we had on the first year of the second age really showed how great Lienzo's cuisine truly is. How great the potential is, I should say. Most people do not have much choice in food, it's mostly black pudding and lard-covered bread. Other things are only consumed as exceptional treat. Therefore I propose we pump some money into local restaurants, so that poor people can afford great food too. Everybody should be able to have fine steak, cheese and wine every day."

Minister Hierro: "You realize we have spent a lot on health recently? I suggest we use this ongoing food-craze to fill our coffers a bit. Let's increase the tax on prize-winning food. It's only rich people buying it anyway, they'll still be able to afford it."

Minister Senagh: "I remember how it was before all these foreigners came here. All was better. I know we cannot evict them, that would go against our fundamental principles. But what if we increased the general tax for non-vampires? That way you don't force them to leave, but do give a push in the right direction. And the extra money can be spent on local restaurants, just as minister Cayu explained. So that every vampire can get a proper meal every day."

Austria

Minister Henricus: "Our nice city of Berlin is troubled by thieves. People are afraid, and business is bad. You just cannot step outside without thinking about these unlucky low-lives. Perhaps you can let soldiers patrol the streets. Authorised to use lethal force. That'll keep them in check."

Minister Gregorius: "These persons should not be killed. For Fortuna might have some purpose for them still. Bring them to the Abbey, my colleagues and I will turn them into exemplars, priests of the lot.

Minister Innocentius: "You are the upholder of our laws. Any crime against a citizen of Austria, is a crime against you. And as you are the high priest, any crime equals heresy. Execution is not the appropriate response. Not immediately anyway. They know damn well that they are not allowed to steal or to kill. And yet they act in a wicked manner nonetheless. Our goddess demands sacrifices. Demands pay back. We shall torture them using geomantic devices to choose the appropriate tool, and after each session choose whether to continue, or to end their unlucky lives."